Love Love Love this cover. Thanks to the EC art department for a beauty!
Dirty Little Freaks is the second of my Valkyrie’s Vow series and follows the tale of Swan and two hunky Spartan’s destined for more than the average afterlife. Throw in a deranged Valkyrie, a grumpy sister, and some animated corpses and Swan will have her hands full.
July 10th it’ll up and ready for your reading pleasure.
Dating sucks. I get it. I was was out there. I know exactly how bad it is. Believe me. I’m a very happy girl since I found my Brit. And I confess openly that I found him online. Like most single people these days, I was dependent on the dating sites to help me meet new people. Bars suck for meeting guys and places to find eligible, fit, intelligent bachelors at THIS age are extremely limited. Even though they were the best choices, Match and eHarmony are still a crap shoot.
Once I started dating the Brit, we both shut down our dating profiles. However, we both continue to get spam mails from the sites. Weekly, The Brit and I tease each other over the email we receive with our 15 new “matches”. He says I should be careful cuz he has all those choices available. Ha! eHarmony, they’re more subtle. Sorta. They sent out an email chock full of dating advice just yesterday. I usually trash ‘em right off, but the title of the article stopped me. Ten Pickup Lines for the Bookstore. What? The bookstore is a pick up place? How’d I ever miss that? I love the book store. And I can say no one ever used a pick up line on me in the bookstore. Why is that? Am I not bookstore hottie enough? Come on, I even have the geeky glasses these days.
So, I open the article and well…if anyone had used these lines I’d have laughed them out of the Sci-Fi section. Here’s what eHarmony suggest you say.
1. Grab a dating advice book and ask if you can test-drive a pickup line on her. (Cheesy line delivery is welcome in this instance.)- —Best if you don’t do this while in the horror section. Just say’n.
2. Grab a random book near where the cute stranger is standing. “Oh, this is that cool book that helps you meet interesting girls in the history section.” — Umm. No it is not.
3. If you’ve read the book the person is looking at, provide a quick, entertaining review. Your helpfulness will be appreciated, plus you’re indicating that you might have similar tastes in literature. —and you won’t sound like a stalker at all.
4. Offer to help her reach a high book, or find a book in a section you’re familiar with. (Some expertise is required here.) —Better have remembered your deodorant.
5. Offer colorful commentary in the magazine section. “Is Vanity Fair the co-ed version of Vogue?” “I check here weekly to keep tabs on my buddy Clooney.” —This is just scary.
6. “What do you look for in a man, other than impressive literacy skills?” —Not sure where to begin here. Better hope she doesn’t answer with charm and wit.
7. Pick up the same book she is looking at. “Wanna start a book club?”—This only works if you look like Clooney.
8. Ask for help. “The last five books I’ve read were awful. Do you have any recommendations?”—Try the kids section. Might have better luck with the early readers?
9. Hang out near the new releases, where most people visit: “Have you read this one yet? Reviews were pretty mixed.”—Make sure you’re not holding up an angsty YA novel. I might think you’re gay.
10. “If we were in a romantic comedy, this would be the cute scene in which we meet, banter, and quickly fall for each other.” —and like my editor, I cut the entire chapter.
WHAT? Wanna start a book club? Impressive literary skills? My buddy Clooney? Is it me or would you expect a site that touts hundreds of marriages a year from using their service and taking their advice to come up with something better than this? Really?
This week I’ll be attending Authors After Dark in New Orleans, LA. Join me, Samantha Kane and a bunch of my other author buddies as we hang out in the Big Easy and sip Hurricanes! If you’ve followed me at all over the last few years, you know I’m a huge fan of the city and its fabulous people. I love this con and look forward to seeing old friends and making tons of new ones this week.
The book signing Saturday is open to the public. If you’re in the area, come check it out from 2 to 4pm at the Royal Sonesta Hotel on Bourbon St. I have a few goodies to give away too!
You may also find me sipping some chicory coffee at Cafe du Monde on Jackson Square!